


Cold Winter Night

by blackbird



Category: Harry Potter - Fandom
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2005-01-06
Updated: 2005-01-06
Packaged: 2017-10-16 03:52:12
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,214
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/168121
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blackbird/pseuds/blackbird
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"He was waiting for her on the stoop, exhaling grey smoke into the night."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Cold Winter Night

He was waiting for her on the stoop, exhaling grey smoke into the night. It had started snowing just before she left the shop and the flakes that had stuck to his hair were glimmering in the weak light from the street. The wreath that hung on the door behind him was crooked, the red ribbon hanging lower on one side, and she wondered how long he'd been sitting out in the cold.

Careful not to slip, she made her way across the street. He wasn't watching, but she knew he'd heard her. She shifted the bag she was carrying to her other hand and started up the steps, stopping when her blue Wellingtons were standing between his heavy black motorcycle boots. His cigarette dropped and she stubbed it out under her toe. Tilting his head up, she had the answer to her question before she even asked it. She ran her fingers over his cold cheek, the stubble rough and coarse, and smiled at him. He took the bag from her hand as he stood up and she went past him to the door, straightening the wreath before going inside.

She kicked off her boots as he unpacked the bag in the kitchen and asked about her day. As she hung up her coat and scarf, she repeated the details of the afternoon without really thinking about them. His coat was flung carelessly over the back of a chair, the melted snow dripping onto the hardwood floor. It was odd, these pretenses of normality they had adopted, but it was this or go mad from the waiting and wondering. As they ate dinner, they both tried to ignore the calendar on the wall, days marked off in red.

**

 _"We'll only be gone a couple of weeks, three tops,” James said as they walked through the park. It wasn't really cool enough to wear a sweater, but he was wearing the one she'd picking out for him last Christmas anyway. It was dark blue knit and seemed to hold his scent (soap, sweat, flying) no matter how many times it was washed._

 _"Did they say why they decided to send you with Remus instead of Sirius?" she asked, leaning into him a bit as a woman with a pram passed them._

 _He shook his head. "Probably because they wanted some actual work to get done, not just wild shagging day and night with a bit of Order business on the side."_

 _"You are a terrible friend," she laughed. "Remus would never let shagging get in the way of something important."_

 _James quirked an eyebrow at her, eyes sparkling. "You have seen them together, haven't you? Like rabbits, they are."_

 _"Well, Sirius is awfully fond of carrots."_

**

Three days later, she was already home when he got there. A small tree was glowing with tiny red and gold lights on the table near the sofa, and she was actually baking. Not just any kind of baking, but from scratch and entirely without magic. The cake was cooling and the frosting was thick and rich, chocolate with just a hint of peppermint. For the first time in weeks, the smile on his face was genuine, and she had to smile back. Bounding across the room like a puppy, he ran his finger along the rim of the bowl and sucked the chocolate off slowly, tongue darting out to get every last bit. Something like heat tickled at her spine and she had to look away from him. Because, from an angle just so and in the right light, he could look like someone else and that wasn't fair to either one of them.

Seemingly oblivious to the sudden tension, he squeezed her shoulder and told her to get out of his way so he could make a proper dinner since she had a handle on dessert. Putting the bowl in the refrigerator and covering the cake, she sat on the couch and watched him while she pretended to read. If someone had told her a few years ago that he'd be standing in her kitchen, making curry for Christmas dinner and humming under his breath, she would have asked them if they'd been dropped on their head as a child. Even she didn't understand it.

**

 _Remus and Sirius were already at the meeting point when they arrived, Remus' bag on the ground at their feet. They were failing miserably at looking casual and she was relieved to know she wasn't the only one with reservations about this mission. James squeezed her hand as they entered the clearing._

 _"Morning lads. Lovely day for a trip, don't you think?" James said. Sirius smiled, but it was strained and Remus leaned down to pick up his bag._

 _"Morning Prongs, Lily." Remus said softly. "We should get going, I think. The sooner the better."_

 _They all just stood there for an uncomfortable moment until James pulled her into a kiss, his arms wrapping around her. She held him to her as long as she could, hoping she wouldn't cry or something else terribly girly. When she opened her eyes, she saw Sirius holding onto Remus the same way._

 _"Take care of my girl, Padfoot. I expect her to be in one piece when get back," James said, hugging Sirius._

 _"I think you should be more concerned about Sirius staying in one piece," Remus chuckled as he kissed her on the cheek._

 _Lily smiled tightly. "We won't kill each other, I promise."_

 _"Be careful," Sirius warned and they all laughed a bit at the irony at him, of all people, saying that._

 _"We will, Sirius," Remus replied._

 _James grinned at her. "Two weeks."_

 _"Yeah, two weeks," she said._

 _And with a pop, they were gone._

**

She let the tap run until the water was almost scalding and began to scrub the plates and bowls. The newspaper was strewn across the table, and he was talking about the Wasps' chance at the Cup and why the Cannons traded their best Chaser he'd never understand. This was a conversation she knew she didn't need to actually participate in, just nod and 'mmhmm' in the appropriate places. When there was a big enough pile on the counter, she threw a towel at his head and he took the hint, folding up the paper and switching on the wireless as he passed it. The Beatles came streaming out, singing about Desmond and Molly, and she found herself singing with them as he bumped his hip against hers as he dried and stacked the dishes in the cabinet.

Snow was falling heavily outside again and while she was watching it, she felt cool air on her back. Whirling around, she caught him with his finger in the bowl again and he tried to look ashamed, but she just laughed. It felt good to laugh and she laughed harder when he smeared the frosting on the tip of her nose. She wiped it away, but not before putting a smudge of her own on his chin. He was laughing now too, but when his thumb swiped lightly across her lips, she froze.

This time there was heat and it seemed to radiate outward and when he stepped forward and kissed her, it exploded. Whatever similarities she thought she might have seen disappeared at that moment. His lips were softer, teeth sharper. He tasted like chocolate and wine and threw himself into kissing her so fully, she felt like she was drowning. His hands were sliding around her waist and she carefully started moving them back toward the bedroom. He nipped at the soft skin below her ear as they navigated the narrow hall and she ran her hands under the hem of his shirt, needing to feel his skin under her fingers. For the first time since they'd found out, she felt alive, the numbness draining away.

They didn't turn on the light, and he let her tug his shirt over his head and toss it away before they fell back onto the bed. He was lean and smooth under her hands and she buried her face in his neck, letting the smell of him seep into her mind as he pulled her sweater off her shoulders. Sitting up a bit, she felt him unhook her bra on the first try and he smirked at her before kissing her again until she was almost dizzy.

His mouth was hot and wet on her throat as he moved leisurely downward, and she closed her eyes, not wanting to see the contrast of black hair next to her pale skin. Cupping her breast, he ran his thumb over her nipple until it was taut before nipping at it lightly. The combination of pleasure and pain made her shudder and thrust her hips against him. He laughed against her skin and his warm breath skated over her belly as he slid her skirt and knickers off. Licking and tickling the soft skin of her inner thigh, he spread her legs and touched her lightly, letting the sensation build slowly. She moaned and begged him to move faster, but he just laughed again as his tongue grazed her clit, making lazy swipes back and forth. The pressure was building and he pulled back just before she came with a grin so smug she might have smacked him any other time.

Standing up, he peeled off his trousers and pants and moved back to her, kissing her again with the taste of her still on his tongue. He was hard and heavy pressed against her leg and she rubbed her thigh against him, enjoying the way he trembled and whimpered in her ear. Pushing at his shoulders, she rolled them until she was on top. Her hair slipped from behind her ears and he reached up to tuck it back, stroking her cheek gently and she had to kiss him again, to make sure he was real.

His hands were on her hips, trying to subtly moving her backward and she shook her head at his impatience. With a smile, she lifted herself and hovered over him, teasing him until he growled at her. She sank down with deliberate care, wanting to feel every inch of him as he stretched and filled her. Rolling her hips, she felt him catch her rhythm and she leaned down and kissed him, their bodies moving languidly against each other as the tension in her body began to build for a second time.

They were moving faster now and she felt his hand slip between them and find her clit, working it in time to his upwards thrusts. In a rush, her senses blurred and she came hard, biting her lip so sharply she tasted blood. Quickly, he flipped them back over and she wrapped her legs around his back as he moved harder and faster until he came apart, crying out her name.

He rested his forehead against hers as they caught their breath. With a small smile, she let him shift until he was behind her, his hand warm on her stomach. She sighed as he pressed a kiss to the back of her neck.

"Happy Christmas, Lily."

"Happy Christmas, Sirius," she replied.

**

 _They were at Sirius' flat when Dumbledore called on the Floo. His voice didn't let on, but the look on his face when he came through did. Her heart was already in her throat as he asked them to sit, and then offered them each a Lemon Drop._

 _Everything had gone according to schedule until six days ago when James and Remus failed to meet their last contact. She notified the Order as soon as it was safe and Moody himself had gone to their safe house. It had been ransacked; hex marks on the wall indicated a struggle of some kind. There was one body, a Death Eater that they were working to identify, but no one else._

 _The Death Eaters had captured James and Remus and no one had known about it for almost a week._

 _Sirius swore and threw things._

 _Lily went numb._

**

The ledge was piled an inch high with snow when she woke up, alone. Pulling on a robe, she went out to the kitchen and found him sitting in front of the open window, wrapped in a blanket, and a cigarette between his fingers. There was an envelope clutched in his other hand.

She curled her hand around his and for a moment she was hyperaware of everything – the iciness of the tile beneath her feet, the acridness of his smoke, the roar of her heart in her ears. Slowly, she took the parchment from him, but before she could open it she felt him lace him finger through hers.

Taking a deep breath, she tore it open.

  
 **Potter and Lupin found alive.**

 **Arriving at secure ward at St. Mungo's today at 1pm.**

  
 **Moody**

She read it over and over, just to make sure her eyes weren't deceiving her. The clock behind her chimed eleven and when she looked at Sirius, he just smiled. Leaning in, she kissed him on the cheek. They would never tell James or Remus, she knew. But she would never forget this Christmas, filled with desperate comfort and small miracles.  


**Author's Note:**

> Written in November 2004 for [](http://chimneysmoke.livejournal.com/profile)[**chimneysmoke**](http://chimneysmoke.livejournal.com/)'s request at [](http://community.livejournal.com/smutty_claus/profile)[**smutty_claus**](http://community.livejournal.com/smutty_claus/). This is set post-Hogwarts and I stretched out the timeline a bit. Very special thanks to my betas, [](http://kellygreen.livejournal.com/profile)[**kellygreen**](http://kellygreen.livejournal.com/) and [](http://daera23.livejournal.com/profile)[**daera23**](http://daera23.livejournal.com/) for coddling me with this story.


End file.
